Tether Twister Pillows

Astronaut runs on spinning asteroid to reach space shuttle's tether.

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"Okay! Okay! It's a draw!"

Curtsey

The Cricketer and the Golfer

Hanukkah tree

"I told you we should have had separate trials."

"No bouquet toss for this bride. She's shooting it out of a cannon."

Two cats making a heart shape with their tails

Jack and the Beanstalk.

"You may now kiss the... Oh, I see you have already done that!"

Mono-Tasking, Multi-Tasking, No-No Tasking and Nada Tasking.

'I have this constant ringing in my ears. I think I have tinnitus.' - 'Does it sound like an 'eeeeeee' or a 'shhhhh'?' - 'It's like the murmer of a thousand forgotten souls quietly lamenting past sorrows.' - 'Hmmm. I don't have a checkbox for that, sadly.

"Architectural Digest calls it 'Twilight chic.'"

"Well, I was under oath, so I couldn't lie outright, but I'm a weasel of course, so I have a way with words..."

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."

"Nothing wrong with half-truths...you still have 50% to manipulate."

"This weekend is seriously messing with some of my previously held beliefs."

'He's calling Running Bear on his mobile.'

"You know... this would be as good a time as any to rotate the tyres."

Blackbirds.

"And if anything goes wrong I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

Hybrid Cat Breeds

"I never lie to my parents, but sometimes we do interpret event differently."

Burke and Hare and Hare

Serf faints as apple is shot from his head by an arrow.