Twin Dynamic Explorer Pillows

'Okay, one time, but just remember who the evil twin in this family really is.'

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

'Ahhh...'

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

Twenty-first century baby walker

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"I don't think you can call two ants a 'bug safari'."

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

"If you really loved me you wouldn't have called me Euthanasia!"

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

"Pride, Covetousness, Lust, Anger, Gluttony, Envy..."

'I think you're ready for the big chair...'

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

"I like to think that each generation will need a little less therapy than the generation before."

The Department of People waiting for Something to Happen...

"Helen, is it possible that we are using our child as an intimacy barrier?"

Let's make a bonfire of our troubles.

"All Vangundy is or ever shall be he owes to his mother."

"Crosby, Stills, Nash & Jung"

"In addition to the menu, we have a few specials on the board."

"Well, if it wasn't you who meowed, and it certainly wasn't me who meowed...then...who...meowed?"

'The reason you can't move the little men around is because it's an ant farm.'

How were the academic departments on the campuses you visited? Dad!!! Stop stressing me!! College hunting is hard enough without you prying into every detail of my life! Arrghh!! How were the drama departments?

"Some people think the CEO has the most power, but I select everyone's chairs."

"Seven hundred wives? I'll bet he had a lot of inlaw problems?"

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

'Mom! Hunter keeps saying I'm not a thoroughbred. Can you show him my papers?'

"It's half past November, young man! Get back in your room and hibernate!"

Hollywood cafe: celebrity in the house!

'And that's Mel. To be honest, I've always found him to be a hard person to nail down!'

"Are you too old to remember all the advice you tried to give me when I was too young to care?"

'I don't like the look of yours...'

'I suppose a loan to send them to summer camp could be called a home improvement loan.'