Modern Dynamic Explorer Pillows

"We've decided to experiment. I'll stay home more, and Victor's going to look for a job."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

'Ahhh...'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"Hi, I'm Pop!"

Weird things I do because of the internet

"Did you get my tweet?"

"Knapsack? It's a solar-powered, bluetooth, Wi-Fi, self-charging, two shoulder GenPak with smartphone charger and GPS."

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"Who can we call?"

A baseball player is too busy checking his smartphone to catch a ball.

Public footpath on a desert island.

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

"If you really loved me you wouldn't have called me Euthanasia!"

"I like to think that each generation will need a little less therapy than the generation before."

You Are Here...Your Nearest Wi-FI Signal Is Here.

The Department of People waiting for Something to Happen...

Modern camping

I'm here to update your census form. Since you mailed the form in, have any of your children moved back in with you?

Old MacDonald had a data farm. AI AI O.

"Helen, is it possible that we are using our child as an intimacy barrier?"

"It's post-gingerbread."

"With the latest in GPS technology embedded into my phone, who needs a map anymore?"

"...as the devices were nestled on their chargers with care,..."

"All Vangundy is or ever shall be he owes to his mother."

Let's make a bonfire of our troubles.

Gadget freak.

'Mom! Hunter keeps saying I'm not a thoroughbred. Can you show him my papers?'

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

"Seven hundred wives? I'll bet he had a lot of inlaw problems?"

Danger Quicksand

"It's half past November, young man! Get back in your room and hibernate!"