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'In a surprise move today, everybody filed for bankruptcy.'

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

Television Readers.

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"No, I don’t find it funny that her first words are ‘South Park’!"

'Where was the TSA?'

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

Eurydice is bitten by a snake

Love is when you watch television together.

'Enough already. It's a car, not a transporter.'

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

Günter Grass

'Have you seen me?' (Brain missing in TV viewer)

"Hmm...I can see a best-selling book and a movie deal out of this..."

"The bear whose porridge was too hot...did he sue?"

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

Succession 2

"It's true, mommy...the chocolate bunny attacked me - it was self-defense!"

Jacques et Jille

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

"It was your idea to install the TV dish on the church spire"

100 best beheadings

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'