Turtle Racer Gifts

Turtle Sledge

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

'Do I remember pre-decimal coinage?I remember pre-Tudor coinage!'

The Stripper

"Wheeeeeeeeeee!"

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

'Now, you've been naughty, you're in time out! I'll turn you over in five minutes!'

The Derby- Horse Auction at Tattersall's

'Look Mummy: I've put on my shell all by myself...'

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

Funky Facts: Turtles.

'He's never been the same since he came out of his shell.'

Turtle to counselor: 'If you don't mind I won't lay on my back.'

"I just installed a home security monitor."

'Last again. I hope you kept a diary of your trip.'

'Sorry son, I bought you an ice-cream at the corner shop, but it melted on the way home...'

'The blooming thing took a wrong turn off the course.'

A turtle is pulling a shell as a camper

Fight against theft of endangered species

'The 20th century wasn't bad, but I preferred the 19th. I'm open minded for the 21st.'

Turtle crashes, deploys airbag.

'He was only ninety three.'

Turtle Eviction

'I guess we both enjoy long slow walks together.'

'I can't believe you only lasted 3 days, 9 hours and 56 minutes.'

'I'll marry you, but only if you agree to separate shells.'

'I hear the meeting was cancelled last Saturday.' - 'Yeah. Someone drugged the hare.'

'You may disagree with me now, Son, but when you're 500 years old, you'll understand.'

"Just follow me around for a day with a camera. It would make a great reality TV show. ... I'm serious."