Turtle-paced Supporter Gifts

Tortoise Football Fan

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

'Wow, these lights stay on the red cycle for a very long time.'

Turtle Trailer Court

"Your love gives me strength."

"Toadstool you say? No, this is snailstool now!"

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

"We haven't danced in ages."

"All good Lucy, I've cleared the beach: you can safely go and lay your eggs now..."

'Grrrr....'

You'll see the food is excellent, but the service is far too slow....

'So, that's how squirrels find their buried food?'

Newborn bird sees tortoise and starts wearing shell.

"Bees need all the help they can get Bob! Think of the consequences! No more honey for a start..."

Honestly, I don't know why I even bring Harold to parties.

Tortoises breakdancing

"Dear, if the news stresses you out so much, turn it off!"

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

'It's another squirrel - from the park. I warned you not to start feeding them.'

"After losing my partner, I felt lost until I realized I had not only an empty shell but also a short-term accommodation business."

Snail with pc monitor.

Yeah, the commute is killing me too: I live a full kilometre away...

Funky Facts: Turtles.

'How's the egg?' '.Turtle crawls out'

'Look Mummy: I've put on my shell all by myself...'

Man's best friend - Man's worst friend - Man's only friend.

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

He's under house arrest. Police Line. Do Not Cross.

'He's never been the same since he came out of his shell.'

Turtle to counselor: 'If you don't mind I won't lay on my back.'

"I just installed a home security monitor."

"It's all hypothetical, of course, but how much wood do you think you could chuck?"

'Sorry son, I bought you an ice-cream at the corner shop, but it melted on the way home...'

Fight against theft of endangered species

A turtle is pulling a shell as a camper