Turning 60 Gifts

Strange Aftertaste birthday cards.

Life begins at 60

A la recherche des cheveux perdus.

David Blaine, Age 60

"Of course 60 is the new 59."

Denise gets offered the senior discount for the first time.

Over the Hill Birthday Cards

"I'm 59 and they say I'm middle aged. Just how many people do you know who are 118?"

"Wow! I pray I look that good at sixty."

White Wine Wisdom

"He hit the big 60 today, and now he's just drooping around the house, convinced that he can hear his arteries hardening."

"Don't laugh, Ms. Perky. I've gotten shorter and saggier over time, but I'm still as hot as you."

60th Birthday

"Your contents have shifted."

Middle-Age Superheroes

"Relax. At your age, it's common to have a nose hare now and then."

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

Gary turns 40.

Inside One's Memory Bank

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

"Enjoy yourself while you can because before you know it, you've surpassed your 'Best Used By' date."

Do you think I'm sixty?

Ed's receding hairline!

Middle Age: When you finally get your head together, and your body starts to fall apart!

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

'Many Happy Redundan... HA! RETURNS of the day, Mackay.'

"As the years go by, and my hair recedes, I comb my parting with such sweet sorrow."

'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

"The cape comes off too."

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'