Tudor Era Buff Mugs

'These celebrity divorces are always a messy business.'

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

Knight Golfing

A Macaroni in 1772

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

"Our focus group will butcher your focus group."

"Where do you think we are in the food chain right now?"

Missing You.

"Got any bathtub gin?"

William Shakespeare

Of Mice and Men.

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

President S Grant's Proposed Civil Service Reform not to the Taste of Certain Senators

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

If the Brontë sisters wrote science fiction

"Say! While I'm off in the Holy Land, why don't you find a little crusade of some kind that interests you?"

Knights of the Square Table.

'You can't recuse yourself from a war!'

"You fools! That's not the boiling oil, that's my beef casserole!"

Verbal Orders

"Never gonna give thou up -- Never gonna let thou down -- Never gonna run around and desert thouuuuuu."

Lady Jane Grey

In the eighties, Americans knew how to be Americans. Big cars. Big radios. Big hair. Everything was big. Unfortunately, I was so buff that all my huge stuff looked tiny in comparison. So I would loan my stuff to the skinniest, wimpiest kid I could find. Hold this. Let me reminisce vicariously through you. (Sigh.) Those were the days. Is it working?

"One of you go see who's at the door."

Kit makes an appointment

Teddy Boys' Picnic

"This is the first time you've ever planned a moat, I'm guessing?"

"With a little luck he'll be a benevolent teenager."

'I hate to tell you this, but there was a hole in my pocket, and I lost the budget surplus.'

Planner at work.

Give Sleep a Chance

A dragon has eaten my knight, please help.

Knight Vision