Truth Teller With A Twist Gifts

I swear to tell the truth, but not solemnly.

The Anti-Agent

Digital Fomo!

Fenton G. Gonklemeyer, Computer Scientist - Booted Up 1928 and Crashed 2009.

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

STRIP Hambone: Sucidal computer over company balance sheets

'I'll be a responsible and mature asset to the company, as proven by the lack of asinine photos of me on Facebook.'

Freedom of the press

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

"Seriously?"

Extremely Practical Jokes.

'I'm sorry but my little boy, Jack, ruined them all today.'

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

'When Einstein wrote about time and relativity he must have been watching a football game where the last 30 seconds took two hours.'

"Mrs. Beetle, Marty's screen is frozen, again."

"We don't have a cloaking device for our ship, but we've made it look like a banner ad. They won't see us."

Rumours Online

"If there is a heaven, why do we end up as fossil fuel?"

'If I got the job as a sales manager here at Zenadine, I would probably straggle in around 10, then surf the Net for a while, do a crossword...'

"I think we could work very well together."

'This must be the effect of the climate change! Even the data cloud has started to rain!'

"Your Honour, Counsel submits the emails are admissible on the basis that anyone could have guessed the password."

I get my ideas on sale...

"I think, therefore I am depressed."

"Ideally, we're looking for someone who can handle change."

"I'd like to report a case of historical sexual abuse in the sixties. I'd like to - but I can't!"

"Is there an audio edition?"

"Target in range. Ready... hug."

"I love these fitness bracelets! it's like having a tamagotchi, but the tamagotchi is you."

"We pride ourselves on defying expectations."

This isn't a good time to see him --- He just got outbid for a soul on eBay. Beelzebub.

"What, again? You've gotta be kidding me!"

"I think that one is a little too honest."

'It's a fake pony-tail and an hawaiian shirt Dad: I'm going for an IT job interview...'