Trinket Fan T-Shirts

"Just because you collect them doesn't make them collectibles."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

I love Museum Shops

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

Never give a cow a giant straw.

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

'You should work for Conglomo. You're allowed the vegetable of your choice.'

'I mean, what sort of thief only takes a dog bowl?'

'Are you going exploring or retrieving a duck?'

Captain Ahab (Ret.)

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

Jack in the Box

"Cool, jigsaw box!"

French Animal Noises.

"The second bag is a doggie bag for my schnauzer, Buddy."

"Tis the season to be jolly!"

'We only have one brand of beer, but we've got six kinds of flavor straws.'

Toast kidnapper.

'The Ugoola's wheel is bigger than ours!'

House for Sale.

'Mr. Pennrose isn't so bad...when he gives someone a pink slip, he always draws a smiley face on it.'