Trial Watchers T-Shirts

"Can you identify the person who assaulted you and then stole your title?"

Trial by Media

"You can't plead cute."

"#notguilty."

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

Before the riots/after the riots

'Psst! Wanna Buy A Democracy?'

"'If you can't say something nice, don't say it at all' doesn't work with a grand jury."

Incorrect weather forecasts.

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

"I object, Your Honor! This line of questioning is really weird."

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

Counsel's Opinion.

"Overruled."

"Let's take in a trial."

'I believe my trainee is putting together the trial bundle for you now.'

"Oh, Joy of joys! We are but three steps away from our conservative supreme court."

"Your honor, we were having so much fun being sequestered, we forgot what the defendant is charged with."

"One soft drink and eleven stiff drinks."

Brett Kavanaugh Shows Why the US is the Bestest Country in the Whole Wide World

A throng runs out the courthouse to follow a car that is driving away decorated with a sign that reads "Just Acquitted".

Shouting Fire in a Crowded Theater

Closing arguments.

"It's clear from the replay that it was a leading question."

'So I'll see you in court tomorrow afternoon...and bring your toothbrush.'

'Your honor, the defense would like to buy a vowel!'

'It hasn't been a complete failure - we've learned volumes about falling.'

'Your Honor, we find the defendant to be the subject of misplaced guilt.'

'The World Trade Organization declared him a barely-tolerated nation.'

'... And then Goldsmith here, said to him: 'Never mind, if you're innocent you have nothing to worry about'.'

"Don't pull that ditzy-chick, routine with me! A witness saw you cross the road, what I want to know is. . . why?"

Dog watched 'Fire Hydrants of the Rich and Famous.'