Trending In Twilight Years Gifts

'I used to be an old fogey, but now I'm post-modern!'

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

"The weatherman said dress for the mid 70's. Bob was elated." "Much. Too. Sexy."

"The Chicken: Just another body type that shouldn't be permitted to wear yoga pants."

Keeping warm.

"By the end of next week, these fads such as social media, automobiles and making fire will all be over."

A Macaroni in 1772

"Absolutely not!"

"Hipsters"

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

"I love this time of day."

On Aug. 3, 1992, the Moon rose over the horizon wearing heavy eye-liner and mohawk. Fortunately it was just a phase.

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

'I know I complimented you on that outfit last time you wore it, but that was in 1980.'

'I love shopping for clothing I don't need with money I don't have.'

"That shirt is so last year."

'No way Doug! You can not stick it to the man in new season, smart casual menswear!'

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"Everybody should live in a market economy. It's terrific."

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

"There are days when I wish we'd never agreed to him changing his spots"

'Can I have mine with the peak at the front '

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

"My scoop-back tank comes in Mango, Morning Glory, and Scallion. Don's Maori surfers are available in Iris, Mustard, and Prawn."

"Overkill, dude."

Bee to bee: 'We used buzzwords before they were trendy.'

'Why don't you use more blue? -- Blue is very popular these days.'

'Which fashion magazine do you recommend?'

"I'm two weeks away from my Pilates badge."

Two Eggs Any Style

An alternative theory as to why dinosaurs are extinct.