Trend Bender T-Shirts

"Whoa, Fred!! Where'd you get that ridiculous shirt??!"

'I've taken my knowledge of science and math and applied them to fashion to produce a wardrobe that's guaranteed to malfunction to get you the most possible publicity.'

"When faced with a tricky ethical issue, I always ask the question, 'What's in it for me?'"

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'Hey! Hey! You need a trout stamp! Where's your trout stamp?!'

Too much togetherness can lead to unexpected problems.

Alternative fielding positions

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

Baseball pitch with a sign saying 'No Left Turn.'

'There are lies, damn lies, and statistics. We're looking for someone who can make all three of these work for us.'

The Mainstream

Black hole setting

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

'Hold it Billy - There are no praying mantises in school.'

Memoirs: Fiction/Non Fiction.

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

Fat Kid 28- Discovers his feminine side

Boys Cooking

'Sorry, Jimmy... our school has a strict 'don't show, don't tell' policy!'

Gender-Neutral Rapunzel

'So this is what you do while I'm away,'

"Let's just say my teacher and I agreed to disagree."

'Great! Now we're getting pulled over! I TOLD you that was a lint trap back there, but did you listen? Noooo!'

"Well, my daddy always says it's not a lie unless the Grand Jury says it's a lie."

Woman goes to Origami Airport.

The Eclectic Chair

"It's a cross between pop and rap. We call it 'pap.'"

"And now, let us view sitcom star Donnie J. Kroft's reading of his will, which was videotaped before a live studio audience."

'What? I'm behind the barriers, aren't I?'

"You might call it shoplifting officer, but I prefer to think of it as foraging."

'But, I'm not fishing. I'm just teaching my pet maggot how to swim.'

Fun on the pyramids

Transgender Bathroom Debate