Tree Swinger Pillows

"No more swinging from tree to tree! Now I take the bus and I even get a senior discount!"

The inhabitants of the jungle get tied up in rush hour traffic.

Lady of the bath...

Golfing Bishop.

'We have Vanilla, Chocolate and Strawberry on your choice of Cedar, Oak or Elm cone...'

Psychic to Leylandii tree - 'You will reach great heights.'

'Remember, we're planting a tree, not burying a bone.'

'Welcome to Heaven. By the way, here's your favorite club you lost on that course 28 years ago.'

"But I use all of them!"

'The water hazard holds little fear for Jesus.'

'Can you pass me the saw-dust when you're finished with it Darling?'

"First I alienated the apes who'd raised me. Then there was a lot of turmoil with the colonials pulling out. Now Jane and me are semi-retired and I haven't swing through the trees in ages. Want a drink?"

Thursday is the new Friday

The Hockey Puckey

Ozone layer claims another victim.

Swinging through the jungle.

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

"So....are we, like, dating now? Or what?"

Camouflage Unit

The Re-Giving Tree

"My mum's favourite recipes are: birch with mayonnaise, oak with tomato sauce, hazel with Dijon mustard, beech with salt and pepper and pine with soy sauce..."

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

King Richard I

'Yes, this is the most direct offsetting of carbon emissions I've seen.'

'You wouldn't listen to me. You have to buy the biggest tree in the lot!'

'It's very nice, dear, but it's still not as lovely as a tree.'

Welcome to Kew Gardens

Jazz musician playing double bass. A cool seagull wearing sunglasses stands atop the instrument.

Changing house name.

Hockey Goal

Thanks God!

'Dad could use one of these when he's playing golf.'

Bob Ross' bitter brother...

"Yes, I did mention that I wanted a big Christmas tree. However, I doubt that will fit in our home."