Tree Ponderer T-Shirts

'I wonder how many board feet are in this tree.'

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

Rock - see you in a million years!

Sun Flower.

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

"And, yet another plus, it will block out the sun's harmful ultraviolet rays from a considerable portion of the city."

'Hello, are you an endangered species or can I eat you?'

'Do you ever worry about our global footprint?'

Guy on island sees giant ship in bottle.

Formula.

Philosophy of Forestry: 'How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Walt? Roger? Steve? Anyone?'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

"Are you talking to me?"

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

Green Pieces Four Leaf Clover

"Your grass looks great."

Beaver looking at the Hoover dam thinking 'You've got to be kidding me.'

"If a tree fell into the marsh and there was nobody around to hear it and it landed on a mute swan, would it make a sound?"

"All I'm saying, Dear, is that sometimes I get tired of vegetarian restaurants!"

Bachelors talking about fashionable life versus marriage

'Another one. Do you realize that will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

Bloomin' moths!

"...The sun sank slowly in the west. Time slowed down to a crawl, and there was no reason to hurry. The tortoise knew he had time to kill. Haste makes waste, he thought..."

"I want to enjoy the greener grass on the other side of the fence, but the problem is that I don't know where that fence is."

"I wasn't getting any work done at home, so I thought I'd try somewhere hot, bright and uncomfortable."

"Yes, the grass is greener on the other side, but significantly sparser too, so it's a toss-up really...."

Will work for grass

If a tree falls in the forest, and a mime hears it, does it make a sound?

Jim's Mowing Services

The food was nice...but something was missing.

Is there life after digestion?

I have these recurring dreams that I'm completely naked in a field!

Erm...what the hell is cud, anyway?