Tree Care Gifts

Man using a trampoline to reach and prune a tree.

'A remarkable specimen. It's a bonsai oak but badly affected by giantism.'

Sawrd Fighting

"Before I start. . . . are you sure pruning doesn't violate the tree's rights?"

"You were very brave."

'Isn't nature wonderful? All those sycamore seeds fluttering over our garden - and every last one of them fertile.'

'Give it to me straight, doctor - is it Dutch Elm Disease?

Two men driving truck that says, 'Tree surgeons without borders'.

"Now, nobody fall while I'm gone because I won't hear it."

"First time pruning?"

'The plums are dry. It's time to prune.'

"It's okay, it only thinks it has Dutch Elm Disease!"

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

Intelligent people laugh too!

Gardener attacked by plants.

Gardener

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Allotment

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

Plant Lady

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

Plants Cheer as They Get Watered.

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

Florabation - '..mmm...It must be spring!'

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

Selfie Stick

'The forest is so dark and gloomy: It's nice to reach the emergence and get a bit of sunshine...'

Tree house.

"Good morning. Fen, Boscage, Bracken & Spinney."