Travel Escapist Gifts

'See you in two weeks!'

It was a new day, new town, new identity and a new set of ethical guidelines.

NO FACILITIES

"He's in a far better place. It's always nice to spend the winter in Miami."

"Ahhh... close enough."

Holiday time.

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

'Relax, it's just like riding a rollercoaster.'

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"Now you can send it."

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."

Saved...life is good!

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

'...I said we've been marooned.'

Where cartoon characters go on holiday...

"Why don't you just go and see this summer's feel-good movie?"

"Let's go back to our cabana, get into bed and shop online."

'It's not a desert island - it's Australia.'

"I'm thinking of leaving these crowded condos and going to a place that's been deserted for years...the mall."

"I'm saving you with this booklet about the Kingdom of Heaven."

'Do you ever just feel like getting away from it all?'

Holiday-Cancelling Headphones

'At least they can never accuse me of 'insider trading' again.'

'You always wanted a larger office with a view.'

"It just seems to me, Howard, that you're missing the whole point of having a terrace in the city."

'If those coconuts ever ripen, I'm not eating them!'

'He needs professional HELP!'

"Quick! Hide the valuables."

"Physically I'm in New York, Emotionally. . .I'm somewhere in the south of Florida."

Spinner luggage is fast becoming the city walker's, walking companion of choice. There's no stopping, no mess, nor butt sniffing, with the added bonus that it comes with you when you go on holidays. . ."

Help! Trapped on a desert island cartoon...

Contestants defeated in the ring toss competition head back to the hotel to recharge for a late night nude hot tub partying and 'bootie shakin' erotic cage fetish dancing.

'I wish I'd never seen Lost, now.'