Traffic Light Humorist Gifts

Babies first steps.

"So this is the secret to the start of labour!"

Push for Disco...

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

Actual Extent Of Doug's Off - Road Adventures (Touching the kerb)

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

'It's a slow trap.'

"Ma'am, do you realize how fast you were... going?"

"Hey! Buddy! This is an interdimensional 4/3π way stop!"

Give Way To Cyclists

Walk, Don't Walk, Laugh.

"The Seven Warning Signs of Seven Warning Signs"

Speed bump in honor of JD Yomp 1866-1957 - Inventor of Asphalt.

'Harold, your right turn signal is still 'on'.'

Toad roadkill.

Snail Crossing.

"The worst mimes are those who pretend to wash your windshield, yet expect to get paid."

How come Mercury gets the car pool lane? He's alone and we've got all these moons!

A license plate that reads LIC-PLT

Bumper sticker reads: 'I'd rather be text messaging.'

'We learned one thing today - NO parking on the yellow lions!'

"Move over, pardner, yer ridin' in the horsepool lane!"

Visual Gag: Caution Goose Bump

'Look on the bright side, Officer, I've reduced the electrical consumption of an entire neighborhood.'

Move to Arizona.

Yield. Stop. We went out a couple of times, but I got tired of the mixed signals.

'Not so hard on the braking, Mrs. Buggins!'

"Over the speed limit, are you sure?"

'I wasn't walking, officer. I was jogging.'

"The test calls for a pirouette, sir. Arabesques don't really tell us enough."

Digital Communication.

Car driver in bus lane: 'But I am a bus driver officer, it's my day off.'

"Where's the red cape, pal?"

'There's a delay on the expressway: A truck loaded with peanut butter is spread across three lanes causing a traffic jam.'

Desert crawler sees cactus holding speed camera.