Traffic Law Expert Pillows

"According to the breathalyzer, the wine definitely represents your blood."

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

'Are we nearly there yet?'

Los Angeles' New Smart Meters

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

"Dadgum this color blindness."

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

"Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't plea insanity."

'So then. The handsome p.c. noticed that the tax disc on Cinderella's pumpkin carriage was well out of date.'

'Driving without a flag?'

At the gallery of Fine Art.

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

"For your information, officer, I was not ‘texting’ – I was reviewing candidate applications for fellowship grants!"

Watch out for the traffic rules! Especially in other countries!

'You were nagging your husband all over the road. I'll need to see your marriage license.'

"You were doing the speed limit. I found that suspicious."

'Good thing your car was stationary when it hit me.'

"I believe you to be over our new drink-drive limits, and require you to blow into this..!"

How you can tell that the environmentalists won the elections...

'On the Highway of Life, Broderick Crawford is always pulling me over.'

All-way stops.

Watch for Pedestrians.

"What's the rush? He'll still be dead when you get there."

Lawyer Xing

"This will maintain your rebellious image in states with helmet laws."

"When are you gonna tell him he's in the protest convoy and not a queue for petrol?"

'Speeding? Of course I was speeding! I have to make over a billion deliveries in one night!'

Seat Belt Law.

'With these new speed signs keeping traffic moving, we're not getting half the litigation work from accidents that we did before.'

Ten minutes later, the rescue helicopter landed...

Bikes versus Cars

'Surely you can't book me for laughing, officer'

'you were doing the speed limit. I found that suspicious.'

UFO at the traffic lights...

"I don't care how it works where you come from....on this planet, the designated driver is the one who 'doesn't' drive!"