Traffic Humor Fan Gifts

'Why, how sweet of you! -- a ticket to what?'

"Both vehicles stopped at the intersection. Mrs. Dinkel waved. Mr. Wang put his vehicle in gear proceeding to the intersection. Mrs. Dinkel also moved her vehicle forward colliding with Mr. Wang's vehicle. Mrs. Dinkel states she was not waving to give Mr. Wang the right of way; she states she was waving to Mrs. Galdys Hooper-Smith in her vehicle passing overhead on Highway I-95, politely extending a yoo-hoo to Mrs. Hooper-Smith and her Lhasa Apso."

Dept. of Traffic Disruption.

Slow, Men at Work.

Laughing Zone Ahead

Actual Extent Of Doug's Off - Road Adventures (Touching the kerb)

Lot for people who don't know how to park.

'It's a slow trap.'

Do not pass.

Traffic Jam

"Hey! Buddy! This is an interdimensional 4/3π way stop!"

'Don't tell me you weren't speeding back there. When you drove by me, all I could see was a blur.'

Speed bump in honor of JD Yomp 1866-1957 - Inventor of Asphalt.

'Harold, your right turn signal is still 'on'.'

A license plate that reads LIC-PLT

"The worst mimes are those who pretend to wash your windshield, yet expect to get paid."

"Move over, pardner, yer ridin' in the horsepool lane!"

Snail Crossing.

Bumper sticker reads: 'I'd rather be text messaging.'

Visual Gag: Caution Goose Bump

How come Mercury gets the car pool lane? He's alone and we've got all these moons!

'You were doing the speed limit. I ofund that suspicious.'

'Look on the bright side, Officer, I've reduced the electrical consumption of an entire neighborhood.'

'I don't mind a medical but I think that's a bit much!

Move to Arizona.

'Not so hard on the braking, Mrs. Buggins!'

'I wasn't walking, officer. I was jogging.'

Right Lane Must Hit Tree

Digital Communication.

Car driver in bus lane: 'But I am a bus driver officer, it's my day off.'

"Do you know why I pulled you over?"

'Ultra High Occupancy Lane, 300 Persons per Car.'

Desert crawler sees cactus holding speed camera.

'There's a delay on the expressway: A truck loaded with peanut butter is spread across three lanes causing a traffic jam.'

Bus Lane - Fire Lane - Pizza Lane