Traditionalist Humor Lover Pillows

"A dying breed since the introduction of those electronic cigarettes."

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"Er – if you young people don't mind, I have a few things to do now. Perhaps you have a hotel or somewhere to go?"

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

Crap from the future.

"Despite thoroughly scraping the celebrity barrel, that Orwellian nightmare Celebrity Big Brother is back on our screens again."

'The village's oldest inhabitant? We did have one, but he died.'

"Oooh, I know what I want to be when I grow up: Retired!"

Two men toting a dog in a carriage by foot, while the dog sticks his head out the window.

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

"He reports to Grand Central Palace tomorrow."

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

Honest Voting Stickers

"Ah...summer...and umbrellas as far as you can see...it reminds me of England!"

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Moscow 1917

The Monroe Doctrine

Before disposing of useless information please make file copies.

Think tanks.

Evil Henchman Gets a Promotion.

"What is it about a tee shirt cannon that says 'foreplay' to you?"

Our large economy size packet hasn't been selling...it's too big to carry home.

Suggestions and Cheap Shots.

"It's not so much a minivan as it is a hearse for our youth."

Police Lineup Escape

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

Euro Collapse

"Welcome to Alabama. Pro-life at birth; not so much after that."

Traders joining Wall Street protests

"Six hundred Starbucks closing? Really? Is that on the East Side or West Side?"

'Escape?...Why?'