Traditional Work Gifts

'Not everybody is adjusting well to the idea of a paperless office!'

Shoe Shine/Lace Tie

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

"I don't care how many likes you got for it on Facebook it's still a D minus!"

Tourist viewing indian rain dance carries open umbrella.

"The social conservative in me tells me to pay for dinner, but the fiscal conservative thinks we should split it."

"there's an app for that."

"No, Kevin, it won't work to select one sentence and paste it 49 times."

Elephant Upgrade

What a stupid custom! I like it. Teddy. Twig. But I don't believe in Santa and neither do you. So don't hang your stocking! I do believe in mom and dad! Ahh

Indian hollowing out log for a canoe sees woodpecker pecking his log

"Get a computer?! Do I look as though I have room in here for a computer?"

'Miss Wayson, find out who put this computer on my desk and tell them to get it the hell out of here!'

"Sorry, I double-booked. This wouldn't happen if I had a computer - but they insist we do everything by hand."

Really, Brother Gregory, that was only necessary on your head.

Shaker Timeouts

"I can remember when all we needed was someone who could carve and someone who could sew."

"Paint and a brush? You're so old fashioned, dad! C'mon, I'll show you how to use graphics software!!"

Winery: Employees Must Wash Feet Before Returning to Work.

"Oh, there's Iza---I know her from my matriarch's group."

'I don't care how young it makes you feel. You work here, you carry a briefcase.'

"So you think you can cobble!"

'Here's trouble, it's the militant wing of the Philatelic Society!'

'When she said she was taking taking up a Japanese art I thought she meant origami...'

Coffee shop request for tea in china cup.

A Sweeping Reform.

"Of course you're not learning anything new here at Petherington and Snoode - we're a very old company!"

"There aren't many jobs for teenagers these days."

Abdul tried his hand at 'virtual' snake charming.

'That's a fax machine. The older guys use it to send messages.'

Modern Art

Bull Headache

A comic strip shows a man watching TV when a hat blows in through an open window and lands on his head. When a woman enters the room the man stands up and tips his hat to her before they both sit down and watch TV.