Tradition Tracker Gifts

"But 'Tibetan Sky Burial' sounded so cool."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

"Ours is not a creative clan."

"I'm sorry, but my costs were way out of control."

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

'What clan do you belong to?'

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

'Plimbco Bank &Trust, Old Money Division.'

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

"I love these old decorations!"

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

"Take the off this minute, young lady."

Pearly King and Queen

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

Out of kilter.

'Minyan Man! You've saved the day again!'

"The Chinese Zodiac told me to marry a sheep. Who am I to question hundreds of years of ancient Chinese wisdom?"

"When I was young, we personally prepared all the food for each and every meal!"

Our Founder picture of a caveman: 'We're a very, very old firm.'

Dance of the Red (Papal) Shoes.

'Here was proof that Lawrence was indeed an Englishman."

Maybe we should stop calling it 'The Masters.'

'You must be awfully secure in your masculinity.'

All-Candy Seder.

"There's a lot of uncertainty out there these days. Or not. Who knows?"

'This year I'm deliverying everything FedEx!'

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

"Tia Carmen, I have a killer test tomorrow. Can you help?"

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.