Tradition Keeper Pillows

"The Kitmans in 12-B. Tell them Elijah is here for the Seder."

"Ah! It's that time of year again!"

"Don't even think about it!"

The kids never let David forget the year he just couldn't find the afikoman.

"I've worked here for thirty years..."

Pesach Nightmares

"We always have pizza for Easter dinner because that's what my mom gives up for Lent."

"You go out there! I can't take the pressure of predicting the end of winter this year!"

'At least they can't touch the village local' say two country gents. The pub now has a sign on the window saying 'This is now a smoke free pub, also no dogs or horsey types!'

Ballydrum Morris Men, "We're excercising our historic right to dance to dance in your pub yard."

The Christening Party

"You're right! It is a mezuzah!"

Why children, apples and honey should not be left unsupervised.

You Will Eat A Fortune Cookie.

"I don't care what your father said, Santa likes milk and cookies NOT beer and pretzels!"

A new generation.

'Not only did he say I can circumcise him, but he also said there'll be six more weeks of winter.'

"Today is Three Kings Day! When I was small, good kids got gifts to celebrate the day when the three wise men gave their gifts to Baby Jesus. But somehow, over the years, lots of people stopped celebrating this special day."

"Unbelievable—Lohri's not even over and already the stores are putting out their Baisakhi stuff."

'It's part of our Thanksgiving tradition - I hide the frozen turkey and Walter hunts it down.'

The Passover Police

'You've waited long enough, Max. Get yourself circumcised already.'

Some men find not shaving or cutting their hair during sefira particularly challenging.

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

'Minyan Man! You've saved the day again!'

Seder in the Age of Corona Virus

"This is what happens when they pull your earlobes on your birthday."

Four men in kilts.

'Well, wadaya know? I guess the little guy didn't see his shadow after all.'

'Ok, we finished that one off. Let's move on to the next one.'

Ugly Holiday Sweaters

"Mummy, are you so very awfully upset at Pater wasting all that money on that big firework?"

'What do you mean the eggnog we left for Santa last night was off?'

"Check this out Debs, someone's made a massive typo."

'Personally, I prefer a more traditional message for Easter Service.'