Trade Guru Gifts

'After a hectic day of trading, some of our traders need to decompress.'

Guy has framed 'first Yuan'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

Jack of all trades

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

The Department of Blind-Side Bias, Knowledge Gaps and Really Great Coffee.

The MBA Draft

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

Will work for ETFs

'I'm sorry but I'm afraid the corporation is going in a different direction.'

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

Robots In The Boardroom

"Invest in technology."

Career opportunities

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

The Shrinking Dollar.

"We've called this special Stocholders meeting because we want all of our stock back."

"Uh-Oh..."

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

The Modern Novel.

'This is where I hang out until bullishness makes a comeback.'

'Well, dad, as a medical student I've got to read specialized literature!'

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

"He's quick with the birds and bees stuff, but then comes the bulls and the bears..."

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'