Toy Soldier Commander T-Shirts

'This is my toughest soldier -- He's been through Mom's vacuum cleaner eight times!'

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"Hey, dad. We wanna play army before we go to bed. Can we have our toy medals back?"

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

Second lifeReal life.

'Just in case there is an accident.'

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

'You can fill your teddy bear with stuffing or with a demonic spirit summoned from the nether regions.'

Model Nato Afghanistan Army

"Ramming Speed!"

"It's the battering classes"

"O.K., Saddam, we want a full and accurate accounting of what you've got - or else?"

A Real Pinata Surprise

Army Man Playset 2020

Admiral in the bath.

Submarine Hunter.

'Please tell me it shoots laser beams out of its eyes.'

'You expect me to play with educational toys during SUMMER VACATION?'

'Polly wants a machine gun.'

A man walks three dogs at gunpoint

"Large destroyer on the horizon, captain."

USS Party Time.

Someone's always fooling around with my toys phobia.

'Bill, I like the way you handle responsibility so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

'This is my toughest soldier -- He's been through Mom's vacuum cleaner eight times!'

'We want the kids to buy it so we can't play up the fact that it's educational in nature.'

"Sometimes I think the captain doesn't appreciate the seriousness of military maneuvers."

"I don't even like toys. I just do this so people won't talk to me."

Russian Army Men Ukraine Playset!

"The play date's breaking up early due to creative differences."

"I hear you're having trouble keeping up with the rest of your platoon. What seems to be the problem, private?"

Soap Recovery Ship

"Do your folks know you're into guns?"

Navy games.