Toy Maker Gifts

'A few years ago all we needed were some people who could hammer and some people who could paint.'

One of Santa's elves is crushed to death by a present in the workshop, ruining the 364 days of 'Elf and Safety'.

"You know, boys, I could get this crap a lot cheaper from China."

'I'm telling you, I don't have a good feeling about this.'

"And what have you done besides this seasonal job in toy manufacturing?"

'I need just a hair cut off this.'

"You're two weeks behind in making toys. What do you mean you now have to test all chess games first?"

'I'm facing unemployment! The world is running out of nice kids!'

'Is everything made in China these days?'

'The Easter Bunny has started outsourcing to us.'

During a respite in union negotiations, simmering tensions boil over as some disgruntled members of the toymakers elf union take matters in their own hands.

'As I understand it, he has a whole other workshop in Hong Kong where they make all that electronic stuff.'

'I need to get away and unwind!'

'I'm sorry, but we've been told to cut costs, and I'm afraid I'm going to have to let you go.'

'I used to be one of Santa's little helpers but since the boom in kids electronic toys, he's got the Japs in.'

'Bad news, guys. Santa decided to close this workshop and buy the toys from a sweat ship in China.'

"I heard that Santa's cutting out the 30% employee discount on toys."

A toy idea that never caught on.

"Whoa! Looks like a worker's comp thing, Carl."

"I don't care how silly it sounds. I demand to be addressed by my official title of, Santa's little helper!"

"I had high hopes of getting into the computer games division but it could have been worse. At least I didn't end up in the socks and underwear section..."

"No the you shop noise doesn't bother me. This protects me from the incessant Christmas music."

"First it was all of that imported stuff and now he's gone with all robotic toy makers!"

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

Help Wanted

"We decided to make the next line of dolls more realistic."

"Still, this beats my old job working at Wal-Mart."

"He's cutting the workforce in half? But we can hardly see over the workstation as it is."

"For the last time, Dad, I don't want to be a dentist! I want to make toys like the other elves."

Rocking horse

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

"December 19, 1960 - North Pole: An innocent water balloon fight turns tragic as temperatures dip below freezing." "Holy Toledo."

"I wasn't ho-ho-ho'ing at you, I was ho-ho-ho'ing with you."

"Santa's favorites always end up in the gift card workshop."

'Oh, sure, he's all 'ho, ho, ho' with the kids...they don't have to work for the guy!'