Tourism Executive Gifts

Sales chart shaped like mountains in office of Mountain Top Tours

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'You're off the plane, Hal. Put the laptop on your desk.'

'NBC has revealed plans for a new, humorous version of The Office.'

"I'll have to put you on hold. I have a bite on the other line."

Actualities - Killing time whilst waiting for the Exhibition to open

Travel looks strong!

'We have a tour every hour, on the hour, Sir...'

Postcards from Heaven...

"I just sold my entire back catalogue of songs for $185 million."

Money Flow increases as Tiger Woods returns to the game.

Thru The Eyes Of A Lifeguard.

"It's as beautiful as the poster, except, of course, no more cows."

'A series based on made-up stories with actors following scripts? Preposterous.'

Airline baggage check in with no custom

"Yeah you can pretty much get anything in Florida."

Bed and Lunch: For People Who Like To Sleep In

New symbol for Public TV: 'The tin cup' (PBS)

Michael Grade is right...ITV needs more real writers which is why we want you to commission 'celebrity novelists get me out of here'.

Russian doll maker takes a break. His flask of tea conceals smaller flasks, like Russian dolls.

"The only thing that stops a bad shark is a good shark."

Note to viewers: We've cut back on sexual content by replacing it with violence.

'Hang on!...You don't expect me to swallow that as well!'

"So, how long have you been a holiday relief?"

If John Lennon had gone into strategic management.

Tourist Information.

You Are Here.

Ned's inflatable raft service was unable to stay afloat, and ended up going under.

"Always leading with Brexit news is shedding viewers by the bucketload to a yellow fat man chasing a blummin' squirrel!"

Castronaut: 'Visit Cuba!'

'This guy is recording our singing, but I can't see us getting royalties any time soon...'

"In the future, everyone will be famous for fifteen episodes."

"This ought to bring in the young demographic!"

"The air feels cleaner, for some reason."

For the last time, no, I have no wish to add a hotel to my odyssey. Why Odysseus didn't use a travel agent.