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Gecko Point.

"In a former life, I used to go to Palm Beach."

"He didn't do squat for cats."

'Those aren't smoke rings... they're Hawaiian Leis.'

'Here comes the stars and stripes.'

The popular tourist attraction of England's Cheddar cave paintings.

Historic and Modern Bath

"I don't know this guy but right here the dog of a famous celeb has vomited because of too much champagne! See? History is my speciality!"

For services to Tourism. . .

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

The Vineyard

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Easter Island legs

'Someplace where we could take lots of selfies with national monuments...'

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

"Hmm...well...It'll look better when it's finished...!"

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

Walking Luggage.

Fight or Flight

Man stood by signpost to 'here' or 'there'.

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

'Are we there yet?'

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

The World's Easiest Airport

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'

Tourists in Egypt

"How about if we just winter in hell?"

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'It's a blonde, long-legged species with a melodious voice and it goes south for the winter.'

'Now here's a place I like!'

Beware of the crafty Kia bird of New Zealand.