Toupee Tester Gifts

'I wouldn't recommend this job to anyone with a toupee.'

Bad for you but to die for

Exam

Tension filled the tent.

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Harsh Mellows.

'This test doesn't understand me.'

"Is this a 'GOTCHA' question?"

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

"Now, in contrast to the last olive oil you tasted, this one is infused with sixty-five more dollars."

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

"Your meal sounded nice."

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

'Will Mr. 'No Comment' please remain after class.'

"You don't mind the psychometric test, do you?"

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

Empty Headed Schoolboy

Good Luck with your finals.

"For the first half hour, I was, like, really there. Enchanted. But I found the wild-quail confit so disappointing that not even the fig reduction on the poached pear could get me back."

Express Barber Chair. 10 Hairs or Less

'I'm afraid I still have more questions than answers.'

Bigger Brain

Avocado Timeline

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

History student: 'I remembered the Alamo ... but forgot everything else!'

'The penguin is upset...'

Real coffee vs usual vending machine stuff

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

'He's wearing a toupee.'

'Relax. This is only a test.'

'Why do my parents have to be professional chefs?!'

'I'd recommend the white wine.'

'...or, if you're watching your cholesterol, we also have thousand-year-old egg substitutes.'

Big Burgers.