Tory Tale Follower T-Shirts

'I bumped into Michael Gove.'

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

'Are you made of sugar?'

Thomas Hardy

Invisible clothes

"Heart transplant surgery waiting room"

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

Upper West Side Story

'I'll place the bets. You just be sure to hit the hare with the tranquilizer.'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

Triumphant mouse posing like Perseus holding aloft Medusa's head.

"He's retreated into nationalism."

'A boy! Standing on a burning deck! I bet nobody did a risk assessment?'

Tea Party and the US economy

'You can come closer - I'm a plankton eater.'

Elizabeth Truss MP

Newscorp hacks into itself.

The Fox and the Crow.

"Have you tried unplugging and plugging it back in?"

"Well, I just experienced my first misophoia trigger."

Goldilocks reads note from three bears: Gone for a walk in the woods. Your porridge is on the table.

Not what he meant.

'The King replaced me with easy listening!'

'Icarus, I think your sat nav is failing.'

"We'd prefer a beheading, but we've decided to sue you instead."

"She was a dish when we ran away together but that was a long time ago."

'I know it's an early kick off but this is ridiculous!'

'Er. . . I had an appointment with Dr. Jekyll. . .'

"I was a childless cat lady till someone ate my cat."

Count and Figaro

Adam chasing Eve with a leaf blower.

'Do you always have to be so quick?'

Twitter protection

Forward looking campaign

"You're going to need a longer lens."