Torah Tale Tellers Gifts

Benaiah questions the mighty men on who pushed him in the pit.

'Yes, all at once!'

Noah's life jacket demonstration

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

Moses as a child.

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

'I think we're going to need an ANNOTATED edition.'

'Forty years! How come that other guy got away with forty days and forty nights?'

"First, do no ham."

Moses Parting the Red Tea

'Whoa! - The activist judges will go NUTS with these!'

'You want us to cut WHAT off?'

"Okay, we get it - You're a social conservative!"

"An amusing story no doubt Captain, but let me tell you about my experiences with the head hunters of the Amazon!"

'The plan is that we wander in the desert until somebody recognizes our right to exist.'

Safer Torah

And Moses climbed the mountain, day and night, searching for some sort of sign from god when suddenly he saw it!

Manna Helper

"Still not sure why Moses wanted a flint knife, or what exactly circumcision is..."

Moses Invents the Top 10 List: 'Whoa, whoa, whoa...trust me, that's waaaay too much information.'

Torah-nosaurus Rex

Torah reading on the subway.

Samson Gets Off at Fourteen

Haman as a child

'No, sorry, this isn't an oil tanker.'

'Why can't you rebel like a normal teenager?'

"Look, it's manna or nothing - No WAY He's going to give us ham sandwiches!"

"Well, you weren't my first choice either!"

'I liberate them from Egypt, give them manna, daily bread, milk AND honey, and the can't even keep ten lousy commandments!'

'I'll let your people go, but NO dual citizenship!'

Joshua as a kid

'Lot was told to take his wife and daughter and flee from Sodom.'

King Solomon