Tool Collector T-Shirts

Caveman tools. Cordless tools.

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

They always go for the hoe.

'We thought you'd like music during your building inspection.'

Swiss Army Tank.

The Black Hole the National Observatory just discovered, where temporarily misplaced tools and parts go.

Secateurs/Non-Secateurs.

Ceci n'est pas une drill!

"I guess I always wanted to be an electrician. As a little boy, I ran away to join the circuits."

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

"I think you might need a few more tools."

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

Take him back to work. He can still hold a hammer.

'Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know the drill.'

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

'I knew you had a bit of rough!'

'Wow. Wooden club. What an exciting time to be alive.'

Swiss Army Rhino

"Depression because you've lost your sex robot."

The Rake's Progress

"As you can see, I have a ton of tools. I just don't have a hammer or a screwdriver."

"I do a lot of work on my house, but none of it rises to the level of home improvement."

"Sometimes I feel like Stone Age guy in Bronze Age World."

DIY Store "I don't know why we come here..."

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''

Before the Swiss Army Knife arrived

'I keep getting these pounding headaches.'

'Useless Tools: Jelly Spanner.'

'I tell you what: This back-scratcher is amazing!'

Tools for fools; A panel saw made of sponge rubber.

"Who asked him along?"

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

Caveman with a stand for his clubs.

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 2