Tobacco Industry Professional Gifts

'It's funny to hear politicians accuse of lying and distorting the truth.'

'We'll have to outsource smoking to China.'

"If you still want to belong to an organization dedicated to killing Americans, there's always the tobacco lobby."

Tobacco black-marketing.

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

Joint Ventures!

F1 - Quit Smoking.

Tonto Casino.

"You come highly recommended. I like that."

'Wow. The anti-smoking movement really has been successful.'

'But our secret ingredient is large quantities of Hilberg beer.'

"Love it! 'People of smoke' instead of 'Smokers.' "

The smoking Gun

"It'll cut into our profit margin if we encourage them to drink responsibly."

Snowman with 'No Smoking' sign.

'Somehow, somewhere, someone's skimming the profits.'

NO smoking...Ties required...Ties & nicotine patches available.

'I think the experiment is over Hargreaves, I've noticed that they've begun to use them as currency.'

"He said if we don't let him in, he'll huff and he'll puff and he'll fill up our whole house with cigar smoke."

Hiree to Coffee Company Hirer: 'What are the perks?'

'It's the only place they're allowed to advertise any more.'

'Cigarette?'

'No thanks, I recently gave them up.'

The Dangers of Passive Smoking

WARNING: Smoking turns you into a donkey.

Carcinoco

"Still sparkling"

The real cause of forest fires

'I agree that it adds to the mystery and drama - however, the office anti-smoking crusaders are really raising hell.'

Results of a Smoking Survey - 'They weren't very passive about smoking'

"As I told you before, I do not allow smoking in my restaurant..."

Day by day: poison gas attacks on European children!

"You're fired, Pembroke. We're turning the office into a smoke-free environment."

Smoking kills...