Titanic Aficionado Gifts

'Keep going...the future of trite metaphors depends on us.'

"This is like the sinking if some really, really, really big ship."

"....After ten o'clock is quiet time on board for the comfort of our passengers."

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

Mini tennis players playing on table tennis court.

"This ump is so good he doesn't even blink."

"I adore kids, but I also adore Netflix."

Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what is good on Netflix.

"You call this ice?"

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

"Someone switched off the freezer...it's melted."

'If that's Dorothy, we're not here.'

'The bar association barred me from going before the bar...So I came to a bar.'

Cast away in a life raft with Dr. Phil.

"...But if you'd led back a heart instead of that spade..."

Titanic iceberg auction

The grazing deck of the Titanic.

Romulus (left) and Remus

Titanic 100th anniversary

Celine Dion

Carpe diem

Daredevil. No. But it's been months now. I wanna talk about it. Well, I haven't watched the last couple episodes yet. Blasphemy! You have one job as a modern American consumer of Netflixian entertainment: and that's to binge-watch every episode the day the series is released. Sorry, little buddy. Some of us have lives. What's that supposed to mean?! Careful what you say around seniors. You'd never be man enough to handle a good Price is Right marathon! You distract it while I make my escape.

'Are you okay, Bill?'

'Todd here syas our plank is to narrow and may lead to lawsuits.'

"It's the racket season again!"

Mother comments on son's slender figure and a stout uncle tells her that he was the same build at eighteen.

Tennis Court - "How do you plead?"

"The one on the left is Mary-Kate, the one on the right is Ashely. Beware them both."

"You'll know when I've had enough. You'll have to wipe up the mess."

Tepid Beer - Going out of Beer.

'He is our darts team captain,he always finishes on a double.'

'You don't need another, Herb. By the way, the sweatband goes around your head.'

'I can lick any man in the house!'

'I'm leaving you for someone who ignores me to watch Wimbledon!'