Tissue Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Phil's made an effortless transition from cold and flu to allergy season."

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Little doctor.

'Hah! The joke's on you — I already thought up a second opinion!'

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

'That was creepy. They ran short on cadavers, so we operated on the dean of students.'

'What great fall blooms. These flowers make yummy pumpkin pie spice!'

Guide to Contagious Diseases.

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

'Veins...arteries...I told you I can never tell one from another.'

Parts Department

"Get another opinion if you wish, Mr. Von Flip...But I'm confident it will still come up ' heads - we operate.'"

Doctors

"It appears your anus transplant has rejected you..."

"What are you in for?"

"Go ahead, tell him... Your friend is correct. Nuts are fruit. Why won't you ever believe me?"

"That's enough about the noggin and the schnoz. Let's move on to the tummy-wummy and the keister."

Medical Examinations.

'Let's cut right through to the heart of the matter.'

'You've a slipped disc in your back and a slipped everything in your front.'

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

'Yessir, I just finished my first spay...but how did you know?'

Body Systems

'Anaesthetic ok?' - 'Yes, ten double scotches from the pub up the road.'

Pediatrics: Anatomy

Hairstyles

The Uterus in the form of a Ewe

'Maggots.' - playing doctor

"Remember that half-dead sansevieria you put out on the balcony back in January of 1994, pal?"

'Urology...can you hold?'

Surgery has sign on wall saying 'To Err is Human.'