Tipsy Trailblazer T-Shirts

"Quick swig first?"

The experienced backpacker.

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

'It's not easy being ahead of your time.'

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

Hither and Yon sign

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"Trail mix?"

"Don't even think about it."

Ski Slope Rated Black Due To Wall At The Bottom

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

Women in a cross country race

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

Wherever the Trail Leads. . .

"Take a right at Rocky's fire hydrant. A left at Duke's bench and the dog part will be one block past buddy's tree."

We need to see him because there's no satellite-based system to guide us on a trip down the path to enlightenment.

'No, this is not Mel's secretary. This is Mel.'

'Y'know, this wouldn't keep happening if you learned to load your pack properly.'

"What happened to the good old Jewish holidays when all we used to do was eat?"

Bear Signpost.

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

"Stop whimpering. Most dogs would kill for a walk like this."

"Just to be clear, this is a hike, not a ‘walk.’"

Glass Ceiling

National Park Map

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.

'Okay. Tiger took care of golf. Serena did her part at Wimbeldon. That brings us to the final frontier... hockey.'

"You can take her ... just pretend she's my mother."