Tipsy Trailblazer Gifts

"Quick swig first?"

The experienced backpacker.

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

'It's not easy being ahead of your time.'

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

"Frank and Sheila finally get off the beaten path."

"Trail mix?"

Hither and Yon sign

"Don't even think about it."

"I'll get my 10,000 steps in tonight!"

Mountain bikes and molehill bikes.

Ski Slope Rated Black Due To Wall At The Bottom

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

Women in a cross country race

"So, how's the money pit in the kitchen coming?"

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

"I love the things I say when I’m in nature."

Wherever the Trail Leads. . .

"Take a right at Rocky's fire hydrant. A left at Duke's bench and the dog part will be one block past buddy's tree."

'No, this is not Mel's secretary. This is Mel.'

'Y'know, this wouldn't keep happening if you learned to load your pack properly.'

"Just to be clear, this is a hike, not a ‘walk.’"

"Stop whimpering. Most dogs would kill for a walk like this."

Glass Ceiling

"What happened to the good old Jewish holidays when all we used to do was eat?"

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

National Park Map

"You can take her ... just pretend she's my mother."

Nearest Backache Specialist.

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"