Tip Collector T-Shirts

'I'm still working on the mystery of how to make a decent living with a tip jar.'

"I was only flirting to get..."

"I mostly rely on a collection of weird tips I've found on the internet."

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

Vendor selling testosterone.

"No matter what, sleep when the bay sleeps."

Al's Farm Equipment: Our Prices Can't Be Beat!

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

'Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know the drill.'

'You know, there's no need to reinvent the rock.'

'Can I have mine with the peak at the front '

Official Team Cap With Beard

You can tell when the blades get dull on your rotary nose-hair clippers.

'Does my head look big in this?'

"The camera is mounted on your desk for a reason. There's been some paperclips missing, and we think you're the culprit."

Pun on Excalibur - Swiss Army knife appears from the lake.

'Would it have killed you to go with a store-bought model?'

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

'It's my latest invention -- I cal lit 'a rock tied to a stick.''

"How can you say my hat is on back to front when you don't know which way I'm going to go?"

'Dude, ya hat's on backwards.'

"I want one of those!"

'We thought you'd like music during your building inspection.'

The Black Hole the National Observatory just discovered, where temporarily misplaced tools and parts go.

"I guess I always wanted to be an electrician. As a little boy, I ran away to join the circuits."

'Good news, Perkins! We're finally getting an automatic postage machine!'

Junk Stamps For Junk Mail.

Octopus Baseball Fan

Ed's Salary Cap

"For only five dollars more, the guy let me have the 'Smart Hammer.'"

'I wish you'd buy another hat!'

DIY Store "I don't know why we come here..."

Little Known Historical Fact: After regaining consciousness at the last minute, Davey Crockett's coonskin cap went on to become the Alamo's only survivor.