Tiny Rebels Gifts

'Don't argue. Just get in there and polute the water.'

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy.' You in?"

"Kindergarten, first grade,second grade, third grade...when do we get to retire?"

"Get up at 7; leave for school by 8; no video games until after homework is done -- how about some regulatory relief?"

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

"I really got used to working from home."

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

'I'll never understand parents. They name you Patrick O'Kelly O'Grady and then punish you for shenanigans.'

City centre pub.

These upside-down tomato planters simplify everything. But, dad. Mother nature wants plants to grow upwards. Sez who?

"I attempted to circumvent the traditional trappings of a teen furlough...but I was thwarted by my czar-ish parental unit."

Pubertry

Men's Department. I want a tie that says, "I hate ties."

"It's perfectly all right. I used to do the same sort of thing when I was a little boy."

'Time-outs might have more meaning when I learn to tell time.'

Gangster Babies

I left my mark on policies and programs.

'We have to get them out more.'

'I said you can't touch me - it's my religion.'

'This bottle stainless steel cleaner...if it's stainless...why would you need a cleaner?'

'Don't worry about a thing, my Mom doesn't believe in spanking.'

"There's a grouch on my couch."

'Dad, I decided not to get a tattoo in the end. Like you, I got a piercing, instead.'

Everyone knew it was a hideous style, but nothing was ever said.

'There's a group here to see you about a class action!'

"I feel your writing style is a bit old-school."

'Let's weight anchor here. I understand there's no environmental laws and the possibilities for development are endless.'

'My land line is always busy...that's my answering machine fending off robocalls.'

'Look out for the park ranger while Bernie and I chop us some firewood!'

'Give me the most soft and gentle looking unicorn tattoo you've got!'

My new trash pickup day is midweek, on Wednesday. Hump-day dump-day!

'I got the habit while fitting in with the old boys club.'

Ace Apartments: Absolutely NO beekeeping!