Tiny Rebel Pillows

'Don't worry about a thing, my Mom doesn't believe in spanking.'

Little girl dangling from her horse track.

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy.' You in?"

"Kindergarten, first grade,second grade, third grade...when do we get to retire?"

"The next song was sixties anthem for the youth subculture of revolution, anarchy and anti-establishment...and can now be heard in elevators worldwide."

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''

'Oh, just chuck it in a corner somewhere...'

"I really got used to working from home."

"I told you he'd enjoy that more than a Gameboy."

"Slow down. I need another drink. Can we rest for a minute?"

100k Desert Crawl

"I cranked up the dose a tad. Why should kids have all the fun?"

'We're almost 1/8th of the way there.'

'Would you mind terribly taking up some other sport besides long-distance running?'

'I'll never understand parents. They name you Patrick O'Kelly O'Grady and then punish you for shenanigans.'

'I'm sure it's a violation, but I can't find it in the rule book.'

These upside-down tomato planters simplify everything. But, dad. Mother nature wants plants to grow upwards. Sez who?

Hipster Police Department

"I attempted to circumvent the traditional trappings of a teen furlough...but I was thwarted by my czar-ish parental unit."

"Sure, my dad and my granddad and my granddad's dad were all domesticated. But that doesn't mean I have to be."

Men's Department. I want a tie that says, "I hate ties."

"Better get a move on, only 1,314,000 steps till Christmas."

'Time-outs might have more meaning when I learn to tell time.'

'What does he know about turning a profit? He wasn't even at Woodstock!'

"Look at these old clothes, Dylan! You know, tie-dye HAS made a comeback!"

'No, I haven't taken up jogging...A velociprator was after me!'

I left my mark on policies and programs.

'Dad, I decided not to get a tattoo in the end. Like you, I got a piercing, instead.'

'I ran the mile in two minutes. I took a short cut.'

'I said you can't touch me - it's my religion.'

'I seem to be very conservative but secretly, I'm a rebel - I don't wear pants.'

'Hey man that's a gas!'