Tiny Genius Wrangler Pillows

"I'm starting him off with a little rope theory."

'Do you think he's ready for the big round-up?'

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

"We've decided your suggestion to have a day care center here at work has merit."

"Oh, Mrs. Horris, he just said his first words..!"

"The good news is we've used up all our bad ideas."

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

'We're the parents. What we say goes. . . In one ear and out the other.'

Kid tries to lasso a cat

'Beware of the teenager.'

"I'm an expert in crisis management, I've got three daughters!"

'No, go ahead and critique my mss. I'm always ok ... after the initial reaction.'

'Thanks for throwing out your ideas, Perkson, but I have to throw them out too.'

'He's not potty trained yet but he defragged the computer.'

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

Spiro & Pusho and the baby choir

"I see you have 3 teenagers, so this stress test should be a breeze."

"She's always been a quick learner."

"I'm sorry madam but we don't make them go missing."

Raccoons! Single file into the crate! Snake! Back in your hole! Crickets! Keep it down! Animal Control Freak.

'The fifth rule of parenting. . . cross that bridge when you come to it.'

'I suppose this puts my new bike on the back burner?'

"Hitch up your horse, Tex. It's time for lunch."

Mum feeds teens with shovel

"Oh no, not dinner again!"

There were occasional moments when she questioned her decision to work with truly gifted students.

"He's at that annoying age where they're always testing you."

'Where do you see yourself not getting tenure in seven years?'

"Being a post-doc for thirty years can really screw up your life."

'You can argue until you're blue in the face, Todd. But you rolled your eyes, and Adolescent Ref is not going to change his mind!'

Writer's Block

'Get back inside this jewel encrusted ancient bottle now...it'll be worth more on the Antiques Roadshow.'

"A splinter! Ow! Ow! Ow!"

"I was using a program to help me manage my teaching load."

'Remember the old days, Jake, when it was just a cattle drive? Now cattle gotta 'jog' to the stockyard.'