Timepiece Trickster T-Shirts

Dickens' Counterfeit Rolex.

'I offer a lifetime warranty. If your watch ever fails just call me and I'll tell you what time it is!'

Clock and bird

Cuckoo clock gotcha.

Cuckoo Clock Dentistry

'Hurry, wipe it off before Dad comes home!'

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

"I warned you about those contortions, Mr. Dershowitz."

Mime Tug-of-War

The inventor of the clock realizes his mistake

'Safe!'

Forcing the Rabbit to Eat the Magicians Hat.

Scarecrow Directions

Sewing Machines in Surgery

'Okay, this is the scene where the bear becomes a parachute.'

'Maybe the Universe isn't expanding -- maybe it's just you.'

Hardware - "Where do you keep the elbow grease?"

'What a divot?'

'Say when.'

Impractical Gardener.

'I found a way to make dinner in half the time. I don't finish it.'

Pianist Fraud

"With my handicap I can park just about anywhere I want to!"

Cuckoo bird to caged bird: 'I cuckoo every hour! Is it any wonder I'm a little crazy?'

'Well, you're right, you're not touching the ball with your hands, so the Ref can't penalize you...'

'You don't have to shout fore when you putt.'

"Boy, the eyes really follow you around the room."

"Oops! Sorry! Clocks forward, clocks back, immigration,migration. . . I never know whether I'm coming or going!"

"Last year, my whole family went on a trip. It started on a Tuesday, and ended just in the nick of time."

'Dad! What time is it when the big hand is on eight and the little hand is all over the floor?'

'Looks like he'd been watching the kettle boil... Poor fool.'

'You're cheating. You're not playing the cards I dealt you.'

'Been in advertising long?' man asks painter, who's painting a pile of rubbish as a beautiful countryside scene.

"Ok you there, text me a number, any number..."

'He's just messing with your mind.'