Tiler Gifts

'Tiling a Bathroom for a Crossword Puzzle Editor.'

Manager of Happy Tiles with 'Grin' and 'Grout' files.

Young Roger Penrose: 'Dad, I want to become a floor tiler.'

Kitchen Tiling.

Rep-Tiles.

"Don't get me wrong, you're a good tiler but maybe you should go back to your old job..."

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

'I installed all the floor tiles by myself. I did it all by tile and error.'

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

New Swiss Army Knife

"We rolled your account over, sir, and that just made it worse."

"I'd like to get my withdrawal in either cryptocurrency or social-media exposure."

"After viewing your current account balance, I think you should read the sign."

Records?

Workaholic goes to Pisa

"Most projects require three hands."

"Always exaggerate. It makes life seem more interesting."

"Let's just get through the first aisle...then we'll discuss your impulse buying."

'OK, give him the money but we'll need to hold onto the gun as collateral.'

TELLER, 'Thirty-seven dollars? -- you call THAT overdrawn?'

'I've had a report of a peeping tom.'

Tips encouraged by ATM machine.

'Taking the concept of 'Bank Holiday' a bit literally aren't we. . .?

Dave had yet to master his new nail machine gun.

'Quick, everyone back to the center!'

"Just a few hundred to tide me over 'til this Y2K thing is over."

Next bank please.

"I want three of you serving customers all day - two if we get busy."

'About this tithing business -- do You accept manna?'

"Edgar, you've been retired for three years now. Why don't you loosen your tie?"

Scrapyard Worker

Eden. ATM and Eve.

"You're overdrawn Mr. Gormley..."

Checking and Savings. Well, a penny saved is still a penny earned -- minus user's fees and transaction charges. (Published originally on October 1, 2005.)