Tie Tying Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Dad, can you show me how to knot this?"

"1-1"

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

Instructions for Bow Tie Wearers

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

"The boss is charging. I knew you shouldn't have worn that red tie."

Arms reach through a mirror to straighten a man's bow tie.

"Gift"

"On this team we take off our jackets,but we don't loosen our ties."

I think the cat wants to go out.

A Meeting of Great Ties.

Tie Rolls

'You don't want the job, do you?'

'The latest market research shows that men's neckware width is the most accurate indicator of market fluctuations.'

Fred's Tie: A Momentary Lapse of Judgement or A Cry For Help?

'Johnny, personal feelings like loud neckties and long jokes; best left at home.'

"I see we're split between those who like my new tie, and those who welcome unemployment."

'He wears a necktie like he means it.'

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

' This is our 'casual dress day'. For the rest of the week they make us wear tuxedos ! '

"You must understand that my total confidence in this plan of yours depends strongly on one's definition of the words 'total' and 'confidence'."

Future History Museums

Tie-Land.

"Then it's agreed, my tie is prettier than Henderson's."

Friendly Tie

"At Hooters I'd already have three compliments on my tie!"

'My power ties are demanding more closet space.'

The King of Salesmen says 'Why sir, I believe you need a new tie.'

"Let's see a robot do that."

'Hornsby, you're fired. Incidentally, I like your tie.'

"I forgot how to tie mine, too."

"No. 3 step forward and whine, 'Please, Mom, I'm forty-four years old—I can tie my own tie.'"

"Hold on a minute, will you? I just want to see what color Charlie Rose's tie is tonight."

'I know we're not supposed to wear them, but I got it for Father's Day.'

Gigolo Diary