Tidy-up Trickster T-Shirts

Vacuuming.

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

"I warned you about those contortions, Mr. Dershowitz."

"I got the kids to try more vegetables by putting sugar in the salt shaker."

"Namaste."

"So Marty, how's business these days?" "Great. I've just sold my homing pigeon for the 34th time."

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

'If Mom says no, you ask Dad -- it's called the 'checks and balances' system.'

The balance of power shifted when sparky figured out how to use the laser pointer.

Sewing Machines in Surgery

"It might be a better trick if you didn't use see-through glass"

'Take that off, Fuller. You're scaring the hell out of everyone!'

"I can't understand why you're getting no signal down here? There's plenty of Hotspots!"

San's old dog with old tricks.

'I found a way to make dinner in half the time. I don't finish it.'

Pianist Fraud

Good boy! Now roll over and play alive.

"I spilled the beans last night so I wouldn't have to eat them."

"Let's just take the Kosciuszko."

'Well, you're right, you're not touching the ball with your hands, so the Ref can't penalize you...'

'That's for not taking an interest in archery!'

Practical Jokes Doctors Can't Do

'Why should I pick up all this stuff? You bought it!'

'All I have to do is clean up the piles of trash, laundry and dirty dishes in my room, then I'm free...'

'I find that if you roll your sleeves down before you go in for dinner, you don't have to wash so much.'

'You're cheating. You're not playing the cards I dealt you.'

'He's just messing with your mind.'

'Are we hoarders?' 'No, I think we're just slobs.' 'Oh, ok.'

'We're half way through teaching her to roll over.'

"I make big batches and freeze it."

Man ready to catch tossed pancakes with a net

"Baldo, you never kissed your tia Felipa goodbye before!"

Sick Day

Webcam Deception.