Ticketing Tactician Pillows

People with and without tickets on a train

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

I don't think we can survive here. There's little chance we can afford the taxes.

'He's been hiding out here for 20 years. Apparently, his buddies forgot to tell him the paintball tournament was over.'

Vinnie's Billiards: 'Heck of a break, Ron!'

"Marions nous! Tu payes les impôts, j'offre le resto!"

"If I've timed this right, symptoms should start at exactly 9 a.m. Monday."

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

'I've got the world by the tail. How much is this going to set me back?'

'I load on the job all the time so I figure it's not really 'earned' income.'

'How do you expect the Government to bail you out of your financial crisis if you don't pay your taxes?'

"That was a rumor day."

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

'I move we go on record for fewer imports here and more imports there!'

Safest Airline in The World

'Should I try a three point turn?' - 'Better not, we only have 30 minutes left.'

"Miss. Wilcox, get me the coast."

'Well, well. You made more money last year than you did the year before -- You people never learn, do you?'

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

"Today workers in socialistic economies sought private sector solutions. Workers in predominantly private sector economies want more socialism."

'The Buck (after taxes) Stops Here.'

Osbourne plans for another 'Giveaway' Budget

"It's written in invisible ink."

"I carefully examine the data for March madness brackets and every year I lose to Anita, who picks by uniform colors."

'While I'm here for my audit, could I interest you in some tax free municipal bonds?'

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

"We should take life one step at a time." "OK, but not right now...there's some dogs do-do right in front of us!"

Martian Rovers find proof of intelligent life on the red planet.

'I didn't make any money last year because you destroyed my incentive the year before.'

"So that's a 'no'. . .?"

'Curses! My eyes were closed.'

"3 ounce liquids! Get your 3 ounce liquids here! Approved and ready for screening! 3 ounce liquids!"

'You can buy low and sell high, but they still tax you right down the middle!'