Ticketing Tactician Pillows

People with and without tickets on a train

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

'He's been hiding out here for 20 years. Apparently, his buddies forgot to tell him the paintball tournament was over.'

"Marions nous! Tu payes les impôts, j'offre le resto!"

"If I've timed this right, symptoms should start at exactly 9 a.m. Monday."

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

'I load on the job all the time so I figure it's not really 'earned' income.'

'I've got the world by the tail. How much is this going to set me back?'

"That was a rumor day."

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

'How do you expect the Government to bail you out of your financial crisis if you don't pay your taxes?'

'I move we go on record for fewer imports here and more imports there!'

Safest Airline in The World

'Should I try a three point turn?' - 'Better not, we only have 30 minutes left.'

"Miss. Wilcox, get me the coast."

'Well, well. You made more money last year than you did the year before -- You people never learn, do you?'

"Today workers in socialistic economies sought private sector solutions. Workers in predominantly private sector economies want more socialism."

Osbourne plans for another 'Giveaway' Budget

"It's written in invisible ink."

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

'The Buck (after taxes) Stops Here.'

"I carefully examine the data for March madness brackets and every year I lose to Anita, who picks by uniform colors."

'While I'm here for my audit, could I interest you in some tax free municipal bonds?'

"We should take life one step at a time." "OK, but not right now...there's some dogs do-do right in front of us!"

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

Martian Rovers find proof of intelligent life on the red planet.

'You can buy low and sell high, but they still tax you right down the middle!'

"3 ounce liquids! Get your 3 ounce liquids here! Approved and ready for screening! 3 ounce liquids!"

'Remember, shares can also go down...'

Ready to move when the other guy blinks.

'I didn't make any money last year because you destroyed my incentive the year before.'

'Curses! My eyes were closed.'