Thrifting Aficionado Gifts

Extreme Yard Sale

'What do you do with the time you save?'

Second hand furniture.

High security Santa's grotto

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

George doesn't really like me using the credit card.

"I just..."

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

'As a token of friendship we present to you this sacred albino fawn.' 'We sailed all the way across the Atlantic Ocean, and all you have is light deer?!'

Online Shopping.

Sale On Slightly Irregular Designer Shirts

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

Crap others threw out

'But it didn't cost anything, dear! I did it all off balance-sheet!'

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

'Attention everyone! I'd like to make a rebuttal of the resolution my husband just made about my going SHOPPING.'

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

"Oh, that looks fantastic! Honey, doesn’t that look delicious?!"

Sale on Three Piece Suits, $10, 300 Polyester.

Garage Sale (sign originally read 'Garbage' sale).

'Hold my purse. I'm going in only to complain.'

Electricity Bills

'Wait until you see what you got me!'

"Sir, there are no waitresses or menus — this is Crate & Barrel."

Add to Basket?

"I love holiday shopping, but with all the scams this time of year I must be careful."

Thrift: instead of 1 tap for hot water and 1 tap for cold, 1 tap for warm water.

Here's Waldo

'And here's the crown jewel of the collection. It's an '86, totally organic, and the UK Bag Manufacturers' Association rates it a 99.'

'He outgrew his shoes on the way home from the shoe store.'

"Tammy's Style Shop went on a selling spree."

'What I really want, Santa, is a front row seat for the Olympic Beach Volleyball games.'

"I only drink on special occasions. Like when some body else is buying."

"There's another one! Pull over!"