Those Lost In Words T-Shirts

'The good news is, you write what you know. Unfortunately, you don't know much.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

"Well what does the GPS say?"

'Cartoonist thinking'

Mime Baby

'To be honest, it's a bit hard to swallow.'

Mime father in the delivery room.

Their father would frequently have to barge in and pantomime to his kids that they were not being quiet enough as they pantomimed actual noisy children.

Reading in the rain.

"But you said that to make it start, I had to 'Boot it up'!"

Welcome Sufferers of Stage Fright

'Let's follow this guy you said, he seems to know the way!'

"Very effective talk on the power of non-verbal communication."

Apparently, there are manuals, and then there are MANUALS.

"Your honor, I'd like to request a new defense attorney!"

Reflection greeting cards.

'Don't give up hope, Steve -- they may decided to relocate a football franchise here!'

'Get a pen and paper quick, I'm about to say something witty before I die!'

"I'd like to announce my candidacy for President of the United States."

"May I write a poem about you?"

Castaway can't remembers how to write S.O.S.

"He wasn't ready for the talk."

'A moiety of twa is still ae.'

"Your comments are interesting, but demographically you don't count."

"You just ordered a large poodle."

Recalculating ...

'Never engage a mingy stentor in a brulzie.'

Sisyphus the mime

(Ahem) Dear Patrons, an announcement: My new collection of spoken-word poetry drops next week. Three hours of rhythmic wisdom accompanied by the constant sound of an iMac booting up … and I'm about to treat you all to a free sneak preview. Get back to work. AHEM ...

'Huh? Sorry. I was in Tahiti for a minute there.'

Somewhere in France - "Here is your yellow canary", has not, so far, been the most useful of phrases.

'The last thing I remember saying is, 'it looks like it's gonna be cloudy'.'

"Okay, okay! I'll ask the next person I see for directions!"

"Excuse me, Officer. I'm an academic. Where am I?"