Therapy Talk Lover Pillows

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"

Licensed Therapist

"I bought it off the therapist who's helping me kick my compulsive shopping disorder."

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

"Postwar is hell."

Couples' therapy

"I have a recurring nightmare that I've taken a test, and the professor won't give me an 'A'."

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

"I sometimes think you're the only one who listens to me."

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

'I haven't been able to come to grips with it. My hands are too small.'

"Oops! I just deleted all your files. Can you repeat everything you've ever told me?"

'I hate Mondays.'

"Well, if you're still awake when the time changes, you'll lose an hour of overthinking everything, too."

'I get the feeling you're wagging your tale on the outside and crying on the inside.'

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

'We have three minutes left.'

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

'I find that a live rhinoceros rather than an invisible elephant speeds things up considerably.'

'Why can't they call it a deer, or a squirrel market?'

Shrinks in heaven

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

"My brother thinks he's a chicken... He's crazy."

"Tell me more about your fear of going bald."

A cartoonist at the doctor, in yoga, at home and in therapy

'The way we met was interesting. I opened my wallet and there she was!'

'On the plus side, I give my thanks this Thanksgiving that I'm not a turkey. On the minus side...'

Beer $.50. I've had lot of psychological therapy, but none of it seems to help. Maybe you

"You need to stop bottling it up."

Stockbroker and Psychotherapist: Money won't make you happy and therapy won't make you rich.

"First, we'll look for repressed memories of malpractice suits."